Enough with the dreams already.

So this time I had a genuine nightmare. Nothing comical about it.

I dreamt that I got accidentally pregnant and it was a very unwelcome pregnancy because I hadn't "gone through the motions" that the huz and I agreed would be necessary before attempting a vegan pregnancy.

After the aforementioned discussion where my mom tried to scare me out of veganism by threatening deformed babies, the huz and I decided that if I wanted to be a vegan while pregnant, we would have to be very smart and careful about it. (And PLEASE do not read this the wrong way and start asking me twenty questions about our growing family. We have no plans to have kids and certainly do not want them for ages. Ick.) However, we still discussed what our plan would be and decided that when we are ready, I'll go to the doctor and get some bloodwork done to make sure that all of my chemical and nutritional levels are where they should be and then I'd work with a nutritionist to ensure I'm getting all the proper vitamins and minerals while preggo. This may sound like a lot of work, but I really can't imagine eating meat as I get queasy just considering it now, so it's what must be done to be a responsible preggo vegan.

So anyway, in my dream I got knocked up by accident (by the huz of course) and was very shocked/upset to discover this condition. I was totally freaked out to tell the huz because I knew he'd be ticked that we hadn't "followed the plan." So then I started debating whether or not I should keep the baby since it would probably be deformed due to my lack of nutrition, and then I got extremely upset because I could totally never abort a baby. This is when I woke up.

Like I said, nothing comical about this one... I think it does show that my mom's tactics did get to me. I've always found pregnancy pretty freaky to begin with (Something growing inside of you?? Haven't we seen like fifty science fiction films with this plot? They never end well...) and now it freaks me out even more... However, this does add to my arsenal of why it's necessary for us to wait to have kids. I'm too freaked out.

I really don't think it'll be an issue though. I eat much healthier and much more balanced now than I ever did before. I plan out my day to insure I'm getting the right intake of all the food groups (minus meat and dairy obvi), pay attention to my amino acids and take daily vitamins to keep my B-12 up. These are all things I never bothered with before.

However, I do have to say that I am slightly disappointed with my vegan diet. Yes, watching Food, Inc. did push me over the edge to embark on this journey, but it was also partly done for health reasons. The good news is, my stomach problems have totally disappeared since I began eating vegan. The bad news is my hives did not. I've now been tested for every allergy ever and they've all come back negative, except for apples. Of course of all the things I'd definitely be allergic to, it had to be my favorite fruit, which happens to be in EVERYTHING! I'm not pleased.

It turns out I must have a "sensativity" to something which "unfortunately cannot be tested." In other words, the doctors told me they're idiots and have no idea what's up. I so need to go on an episode of House. Dr. House would totally know what the dealio is. I'm so glad I've drained myself of all my blood for testing over the past few years to discover my 'sensitivity' to who knows what.

But the worst of it is, they assume the sensitivity is indeed to gluten. In other words, this may be my last blogpost because I am soon going to starve to death. No meat, no dairy, no eggs, no gluten? Boo. Huge sad face. I don't miss the meat, dairy, or eggs (ok, maybe occasionally the dairy) but I freaking looooove gluten-filled carbolicious foods. I have heard this is a direct result of my Finnish descent. We were programed to crave carbs to plump us up for the winter when food would be scarce so that we could survive to the next spring and summer. I like this explanation better than saying I lack all self-control or willpower to control my bagel cravings.

So anyway, I'll keep you posted on my slow descent into starvation. I had a bagel this morning at Starbucks. I decided I needed one last farewell gesture. And of course, I now have hives on my eyes. I think most people assume the huz beats me. It gets that bad. Luckily, huge granny sunglasses are totally in in New York, especially when inside. (Don't you know your cool factor raises 10 points if you wear your sunnies inside? Of course you didn't, you're not from New York.) so I just walk around in those all day and people assume I'm too important to make eye contact with them (which is also obviously true).

I have no fun pictures for you this post as I have been totally lazy and getting salads out or not making fun recipes from scratch. I did, however, make the Gardenburger Blackbean Chipotle burgers that I blogged about a few posts back. Woah nasty. I hated them. The huz loved them though, so I guess that just goes to show you how completely unrefined his palate is. Just kidding. Love the huz.

Tonight I'm going to search for another fun quinoa recipe to make and well let you know how it goes tomorrow. That is if I actually bother to cook tonight. Don't hold your breath.

Can vampires be vegan?

I have now had three nightmares concerning my recent lifestyle change. So weird considering that I rarely, if ever, have dreams. I've heard this means that I'm so continually exhausted that my brain is too tired to even bother working at night time. Sounds about right lately.

But anyway, my second dream was last weekend just after getting back from spending Mothers Day with the fam in Philadelphia. My mom was trying to scare me out of veganism at dinner telling me that I'll end up with deformed babies because of the B-12 and Folic Acid deficiency that can easily occur if you don't eat healthfully and take vitamins while on a vegan diet. That night, I dreamt I was prego and the doctors were all scared of my baby bump and would come nowhere near it telling me I was having a demon baby. Then I ended up having a baby and it was a little kitten that looked just like Tundra (my own cute baby kitty)! Then I woke up. I have no idea what the meaning of this dream is, but if eating a vegan diet while pregnant results in giving birth to cute kittens, that sounds alright to me.

My most recent dream was this past weekend, again while in Philadelphia. (I notice that all of my dreams have to do with Philly... maybe there's a lot of negative anti-vegan energy coming my way from those parts...) My parents had a graduation party for my sister (and me by default as well since we're graduating in such a quick succession) and I was talking to one of my parents' lifelong couple friends about books. The wife is a crazy reader just like me and we were discussing my mild obsession with adolescent fiction, especially vampiresssss. (Yes, I have read Twilight. Yes, I do watch the movies. No, I'm not ashamed of myself.)

There was also a lot of discussion of my vegan diet. These two discussions combined and created an uber nasty nightmare. I can't remember the beginning of it too well, but I do remember the end. A pack of vampires was chasing me and trying to get me because I was a vegan and the only way to stop them was to kill my kitty who was on a runaway train. So I was running to try and save the love of my life and try to evade the vampires, but of course they have super-human speed, so I couldn't. Just when the vampires were about to get me, I woke up all panicked. I was super freaked out so I went to get a drink of water and it was then I realized that my nightmare was actually quite comical. However, during the dream it was extremely terrifying. Maybe if I'd stayed asleep long enough all the vampires would have died due to a garlic overdose from my blood. I have started using way too much of it since I became a vegan...

I thought I remembered that the vampires in my dream were also vegans. But when I thought about it, I realized that that made no sense. Vampires can't be vegan. Last time I checked, no blood in celery. 

I think my family's favorite part about me becoming a vegan are my increasingly absurd dreams about it... 

But anyway, this past weekend I was back in Philadelphia to attend my sister's graduation party and ceremony. I assumed that this grad party would have nothing I could eat, so I went shopping on my way home and got all the ingredients for a yummy garbanzo bean (or chick pea, but garbanzo is so much more fun to say, garbaaaaaanzoooo) salad. I think the madre was a bit offended by this. "Did you actually think I'd throw a party without taking your dietary needs into consideration?!" Ummm, yes? But, I was glad to be proven wrong. 

Look at how much yummy yummy vegan food I could eat at the party!!

I was such a lucky little vegan! My mom even told people who called up and asked what to bring that they should make something vegan friendly! What a good madre I have!

Not only that, my mom made me a vegan graduation "cake." Last weekend when I was home, I was lamenting the fact that I could never have another cake again (and yes I realize you can make vegan cakes, but I was in the mood to be melodramatic). Sooo, the madre made me a cake! I LOVED IT!!!

A plate of roasted red pepper hummus with cucumber letters! How creative is she! However, by the end of the night when the huz, my sister and a friend got hold of it, it did not look so good.

That was the best we could come up with. I think we need to join a Scrabble club and hone our skillz. Any possible definitions for nags-crap? I think it's the poo of old unhappy ladies. Just a guess.

But all in all, I was happy and stuffed and full of vegan yumminess after the party. Success in my book.

I think I'm being subconsciously tortured.

So I had a nightmare about eating meat last night. No, seriously.

I can't remember anything else, but I was at my parents' house in their old kitchen before it was remodeled and I was standing there with someone (I think it was my Nannie??) and I was munching down on a yummy slab of roast beef (which is super awkward because I've always hated it and would never eat it even when devouring innocent animals was totally my thing). So I was eating around the outside of my slice of roast beef where it was well done; then I got to the middle where it was pink and bloody. We'll call it medium-rare. That is when I flipped out in my dream because I realized I was eating meat and had a total spaz and my Nannie let out a very horrible, evil laugh. Then I woke up. The end.

I may actually be traumatized from this horrific experience.

I'm going to blame that episode on being super cold because we turned the air conditioner on for the first time last night and it blasts right on my head. It is a proven fact that if you're cold, you're more likely to have nightmares. You can quote me on that.

Beside my nightmare, I almost starved to death this weekend. Some friends came to town and we went out to a super cute restaurant, Good, in the West Village. However, I don't think there could have been a less vegan-friendly place in all of the city. One of my friends came to my rescue and told the waiter I was a vegan (which I am realizing is an important thing to do when eating out... there seems to be animal byproducts in everything). So then at least the waiter was on board helping me find something that worked for my diet.

At first I thought I'd get the carrot puree soup. But no, it was made with chicken stock. Then I thought I'd get the hummus. But no, they mixed in parmesan. After that, all that was left was olives (I ate two bowls almost and got effing oil on my pretty red dress which is totally their fault since they didn't have non-oily vegan-friendly fare. Good, we aren't all good. That's all I'm saying.) and the side dishes. So finally I ended up with a dinner of grilled asparagus, sautéed zucchini and steamed green beans with pesto. However, this was only another disappointment as the pesto also had parmesan in it... boo. Sooo my lovely expensive dinner consisted of: olives, zucchini and asparagus. It was yummy, but horribly balanced. There was no vegan-friendly protein... I have a feeling this will be an issue many times over when moving forward. Moral of the story: tell waiters you're a vegan so they can help and carry trail mix or a vegan-friendly snack so you don't wither and die when there's nothing you can eat.

The next morning, we all went out to brunch at a diner. It was then I realized brunch is the least vegan-friendly meal EVER. Pancakes? nope. Waffles? nope. French toast? nope. Omelets? nope. Eggs? nope. Bacon? nope. Sausage? nope nope nope. All that was left for me was toast sans butter. Or possibly hash browns depending on how they're cooked. And although I did just register for the marathon, I seriously don't think I need to go and carboload on bread and potatoes. Sooo, I ended up getting a veggieburger for brunch. It did not look appetizing at all. Picture a teeny, tiny bun (most likely made to suit little elfin hands or else the non-existent appetites of the women on the Upper East Side) and a huge fluorescent green patty. However, I was a good sport, so I dumped a ton of ketchup on it and went for it. Interestingly enough, it was really quite delicious. The fluorescent green actually came from super scrumptious lima beans. Who would have thought? I used to hate those things so it was a very exciting discovery. Very exciting indeed.

So yes, I almost starved to death this weekend. But as you can see, I somehow managed to survive. You're lucky I have such a fight in me.

When I went to eat my breakfast this morning, I noticed a horrendous oversight in my grocery store's labeling abilities.

They're lucky I have the smarts and can read labels and know that my organic Weetabix is actually all yummy grains and totally animal-nasty free. However, if I was a slightly less smart vegan, they may have lost $5.89. That would obviously have gravely affected their profit margin for the day. Who else in my area is going to spend $6 on a box of straight-up wheat? My point exactly.

On that note, I'm off to bed. Pray for no more meat-consuming nightmares. They scare me.